Work With What's Working

One of the first steps to overcoming depression is to work with what's working. I know, it seems pretty simple, but when you're suffering from depression it can be difficult to even recognize what's working in your life, let alone work with it! The other day in my post Break Through Depression, I asked you to make a list of what's working in your life. Some people misinterpreted the question to mean "what works to help you get through or avoid depression?" All the suggestions I received were very good and many happen to be covered in my upcoming posts on this topic. However, if you were one of the people who misinterpreted the question, what I mean is: what do you have or do in your life right now that you are satisfied with?

There's an old saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the bath water." Depression will trick you into believing that your whole life is a waste and there's nothing good about it, but that isn't true. Even if your "what's working" list is short, there are some things that you've got going on in your life right now that are good. If your depression really has a hold on you, it's quite normal for the "what's working" list to be short because depression robs you of the ability to see your life clearly.

The chances are pretty high that the things which are causing you pain and sadness are things you are powerless to change. They're things out of your control, and things you just have to learn to live with. It takes time to be okay with those losses and disappointments, but the only way you'll be able to learn to live with them is if you start living again! In order to do that, you need to recognize your right to enjoy life and then actively seek positive experiences.

Now that you have your list, even if it's short, the next step is to explore how you can maximize your enjoyment of these things, and what other opportunities for enjoyment they provide. If your job is something that's really working for you right now, you may not be able to work more hours to get more enjoyment, and that might not be healthy anyhow. However, you can explore the opportunities available to you because of your work and you might find additional ways to maximize enjoyment. For example, does your work provide opportunities for travel or meeting new people? These are things you could take advantage of to increase your enjoyment of life overall. Take the things on your list and seek ways to increase your enjoyment of them and ways to celebrate them.

Don't tell me that it's selfish to become a pleasure seeker. You need to realize that you can't be as good a friend, parent, or employee while struggling with depression as you can be when you're happy and healthy. You need to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else. It's time to take charge of your life again and refuse to let depression rob you of any more positive experiences!

~*~Monica Who~*~

Create a "Happy Trigger"

Events in your daily life trigger emotional reactions; they can trigger joy and gratitude, stress and anxiety, or even sadness and depression. Something as simple as a scent or a smile from a stranger can trigger emotions. Today I want to teach you how to create a "happy trigger" that can pull you back into a state of joy and optimism whenever you need it, regardless of other events triggering different emotional reactions.

If you read my post yesterday, Break Through Depression, then you've probably made a list of things that are working in your life and you might be wondering what to do next. Don't worry--I'll come back to that. Today, see if you can add at least one more thing to that list...

I want to teach you how to create a "happy trigger" right now because it can take some practice and I want you to start right away.

Think about a time in your life when you were truly happy. Think of your happiest memory. Close your eyes and recreate that memory in your mind with as much detail as possible. Hold it firmly in your mind; replay it a few times until that blissful emotion fills your heart completely. Now place your right hand over your heart while you replay that memory. Feel your heart beating while you experience the joy of your happiest memory. Breathe deeply and evenly. Hold your hand over your heart for three to five minutes while you focus on the emotions triggered by your happiest memory.

Repeat this exercise twice a day for a week. If you find your mind drifting, think of other happy memories to prevent boredom. As you recapture the positive emotions of your joyful memories, breathe evenly and hold your right hand over your heart. You are training your mind and creating a "happy trigger." Soon you will be able to place your hand over your heart, take deep and even breaths, and instantly experience deep feelings of happiness. It will take practice for your mind to associate the gesture of placing your hand over your heart with experiencing positive emotions, so continue to work at it every day until you are able to experience instant joy with this simple gesture.

Use this trigger to bring you back to a state of joy whenever life starts to get you down. When you're in a state of joy, it's much easier to see your life as a gift and you will find it much easier to face challenges with optimism. You can start to find and act upon solutions to your depression once you have a positive and optimistic perspective.

Depression will tempt you to hold onto pain, to wallow in it until you feel nothing else. Depression will lie to you. Depression will tell you that the slightest upset, disappointment or set back in your day means that you will never be happy and your life is worthless. Depression will tell you there's no way to restore hope, and that Monica's "happy trigger" suggestion is stupid, pointless and will never work. These thoughts can be so convincing, but they are lies. Remember: you were happy in the past which means you can be happy again! It isn't even as difficult as your depression wants you to believe.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Break Through Depression

The holiday season can be a difficult time, especially if things aren't going right in your life or you're struggling with unfulfilled hopes and dreams. This is the time of year when depression can really sink in. One thing I've learned about life is that life is really cool! It has a way of surprising you in the most unexpected ways. However, depression robs you of the ability to step back and say, "Wow, life is so amazing!" When you're depressed, everything seems to get worse and worse.

I say this because I know depression. I have dealt with and overcome severe depression and I know how difficult it can be to break through it. I want to do everything I can to help others break through and be able to experience the awe and joy that life has to offer! Over the next little while, I'm going to post several articles about overcoming depression, with specific tips to help you get the most enjoyment out of your life.

I encourage you to share your thoughts and experiences with comments or private emails. Talking about it is an important step to breaking through it because it helps you to see that you're not alone. No one will ever have the same experiences that you have or feel the same way that you feel because you are unique in every way, but seeing that others have similar experiences and feelings will benefit you.

The first thing I want you to do is take an honest look at your life and answer this question: what is really working for you? You already know what isn't working, your depression reminds you of those things multiple times every day, but if you honestly look at your life, you will discover that some things really are working. Maybe it's just that your cat purrs when you give her love--but that's something! Make a list of everything that is working (and feel free to add it to the comments for this post). Writing the list might even make you smile--and tomorrow I'll write about what to do next.

Last year at this time, I found myself struggling with the most severe depression of my life and I wasn't enjoying the holiday season. I had always loved Christmas time, and I was honestly angry that depression was robbing me of that! I was enjoying my work though, and that gave me something to start with. I took an honest inventory of all the things that were working for me and it helped me regain hope and be able to see some solutions.

I look forward to helping you discover your solutions too!

~*~Monica Who~*~

Resolving Conflict Through Communication

The best way to resolve conflict in any situation in your life is through communication. Regardless of the nature of the conflict, the same communication strategy can work to resolve the conflict. The first thing you need to do is be a good listener. If you try to convince the other person that you're right and they're wrong, you're not likely to get very far and the conflict will probably escalate.

The first step toward resolving the conflict is to get the other person to express their point of view as clearly as possible. Set aside your emotions and your point of view, and ask the other person how they see the situation. Be calm and express that you are genuinely interested in hearing their side. Listen closely without becoming judgemental or defensive. If there's anything you can agree with them on, point it out, but reserve your disagreements for later. Don't tell the other person, "I can see where you're coming from," if you honestly don't see their point of view clearly. If you still don't understand, ask questions and encourage the other person to keep talking until you actually do have a good understanding of their position.

When the other person feels they have truly been heard and understood, they're far more likely to listen to your point of view with the same level of respect you gave them. After you listen to everything they had to say, and pointed out any aspects of their position that you could really agree with, you can express your side of things and the points you disagree on. You need to be as calm and rational as possible, and if any of your points are based on emotional reactions, try to explain your emotions clearly from your point of view without passing judgement on the other person. For example, you might say, "I feel like you don't consider my feelings when you..." rather than saying, "You never think about how I feel when you..."

After both of you have had the opportunity to express your opinions, beliefs and points of view, you probably have some mutual understanding to work with and you certainly have created an atmosphere of mutual respect that will go a long way in helping you resolve the conflict! If you have found some common ground that you both agree on, you can brain storm together about possible solutions to the problem you're facing. At that point you've transitioned from conflict to cooperation. If neither of you have been able to agree with any aspect of the other person's point of view, you either have to agree to disagree (which only works if there is mutual respect) or you need to continue trying to understand each other better, but in most situations you will actually find some common ground that will be your starting point to resolving the problem.

Remember that successful conflict resolution isn't necessarily about being right or getting your way; it's about being understood and finding a solution that works for both of you.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Obligations, Promises and Integrity: Food for the Soul

Our lives are full of all sorts of obligations including work, promises made to friends and family, and even obligations based on spiritual beliefs and personal integrity. All of those demands and pressures can weigh you down and cause you to feel like life would just be a whole lot better if you didn't have any obligations at all!

Broken promises erode the trust between people as well as the credibility of the individual or organization that made and failed to carry through with the promise. If you fail to carry through with your obligations and break promises you have made, people will have no choice but to withdraw some or all of the trust they placed in you and they are more likely to turn to someone else in the future. This is the same in business as it is in personal relationships, although in business there's often no opportunity to redeem yourself.

It's easy to see what you stand to lose by breaking promises and reneging on obligations, but do you realize all that you stand to gain by fulfilling them? Of course there is the benefit of building even more trust and credibility, but there is an even greater reward. When you fulfill your obligations and promises, it builds your confidence, self esteem, self-respect and sense of integrity--providing you with a surge of positive energy that is fuel for your spirit! You will also have less need for validation from external sources in order to feel good and worthy.

While it is true that you can't break promises if you avoid making any in the first place, this mindset does not help you achieve the deep sense of purpose and value that your spirit requires for living. Life without obligations might sound easier but in reality it's much more difficult because you have no direction or purpose. If you're finding it difficult to meet your obligations and fulfill your promises, try focusing on the benefits you'll receive, especially the ability to feel even better about yourself.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Take a Brief Meditation Retreat

If you're feeling stressed, run-down or burnt out by your hectic life, get instant relief and spiritual enlightenment by taking a brief meditation retreat. You will need to physically retreat to a private location such as your bedroom, the balcony, a quiet spot outdoors, or any other place where you can have privacy. Turn off your cell phone and remove any other distractions--this will be a relatively short break from your hectic life (ten or fifteen minutes will do), so you don't need to worry about the phone or anything else. Make yourself comfortable. Enjoy a cup of coffee or tea, or even a light snack during your retreat.

That's the retreat part of the plan, now onto the meditation. Use this short time to ponder a concept, idea or question. Some good examples are the nature of love, the benefits of friendship, the idea of unconditional trust, etc. If you are troubled by an issue in your life, such as conflict with a co-worker, you can use it as your topic for your brief retreat but just don't be too specific. (This retreat is not to be used for fretting about specific issues of your day-to-day routine.) For example, ponder a related concept such as competition or a question like, "How can I improve my communication skills to reduce conflict with others?" During your retreat, think about your chosen concept, idea or question and exclude all other thoughts.

Your brief meditation retreat is a light meditation session. The privacy and relaxation will help refresh and recharge you, and the meditation will lead to deeper understanding of the issues in your life as well as spiritual enlightenment.

When your ten or fifteen minutes are up, return to your regular routine even if you have not reached a deep understanding of your concept or answers to your question. Don't worry--you can continue pondering on your next retreat.

Make the brief meditation retreat part of your daily routine to promote inner peace, enlightenment and wellness. This his how I start every single day, and I take several brief retreats throughout the day (anytime I need a short break) and it helps me to recharge between sessions with my clients, remain centered and develop a deeper understanding of myself, interactions with other people, and life in general. Some people feel too busy for a half hour or an hour of meditation every day, but anyone can make ten minutes for a little relaxation and meditation!

~*~Monica Who~*~

P.S. If you need a really good meditation topic, one that will keep you thinking endlessly, I highly recommend my personal favourite: the reality of illusion and the illusion of reality. I guarantee this one will continuously challenge and expand your perceptions for the rest of your life!

Dream Themes & Symbols: Infants and Children

People often ask me what infants mean in their dreams, and they wonder if these dreams mean pregnancy is just ahead in their future. I want to remind you that while we do have prophetic dreams from time to time, the majority of our dreams contain messages about the past and present. To understand the meaning of an infant in a dream, you need to consider the common ideas associated with infants and birth, as well as your personal associations.

If you had a new baby in your life your responsibilities would increase, which is why most dreams about infants convey messages about responsibility. Babies are completely helpless and require a lot of care, so the message in this type of dream can be that you feel helpless about something in your present life, or that you're experiencing a strong desire to be taken care of or to nurture someone else. Another concept connected with infants is creation; your dream could be telling you something about what you are manifesting in your life right now, or even creative endeavours. People sometimes refer to special projects as their "baby," and infants in a dream can also express messages about an important project you've been working on or are planning to start. Consider these associations when you explore the meaning in your dreams about infants. Of course, if you are already pregnant or trying to conceive, your dream probably expresses your hopes or fears.

Children in dreams can represent innocence, playfulness, inexperience, learning, youth, and memories of your own childhood. If you are already a parent, dreams of children can convey messages about your own children (or how you view your children) even if the dream children don't resemble your own kids. Quite often, dreams of children involve messages regarding your inner child.

As always, the events of the dream and your emotional reactions hold important keys to unlocking the message. You should never jump to conclusions about your dreams: carefully consider all the elements and events of the dream, ask yourself how it relates to your present circumstances, and be open to receiving guidance from your dreams.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Prepare for the New Year and Manifest Your Dreams!

You might wonder why you should prepare for the New Year now because there's still six weeks left in 2007, and you probably have to make preparations for the holiday season. Of course you don't need to prepare for the New Year, you can just go with the flow and see what happens, but it's your future and I don't think there's any good reason to skip planning for your happiness and success. Next year you are going to manifest your dreams, in accordance with your highest good and the highest good of all concerned! Especially if you have never tried manifesting before, I want you to give this a try...

Sit down and spend some time really thinking about what would make you truly happy next year. What would make you feel fulfilled and also benefit the people around you? What would make your life easier? What do you want to accomplish in 2008?

Now get a piece of paper and get ready to make a list. At the top of the paper write, "I will receive guidance and support to make these dreams a reality in 2008."

Write down your dreams and goals for 2008. You may want to break your list down into categories such as: family life, social life, romantic life, spiritual life, financial life, material possessions, and self improvement. Think about what you want from your personal relationships, where you want to be living, things you want to own that will make your life easier, and definitely do not forget any improvements you intend to make for your mind, body and spirit. You can also add dreams that simply increase your enjoyment of life such as your hobbies, travel and recreation.

Be specific about your goals; instead of "make more money" you may want to write "increase earnings by 30%." Of course there is no limit to how much you can manifest in 2008, but you do need to understand that you and God are partners in manifesting your dreams and God will only allow what is in your highest good. For some people, a sudden windfall of money (like winning the lottery) can cause a great deal of turmoil if they are not prepared. It would not be in your highest good to suddenly have ten million dollars unless your personal relationships are strong and healthy enough, and you have overcome any addictive tendencies, for example. This doesn't mean you can't manifest lottery winnings in 2008--but if you want to add that to your list, be sure to think about what else you might need in order to cope with the financial blessing.

When you have completed your list, read it over several times to make sure you didn't overlook anything. Finally write at the bottom of the list, "My dreams for 2008 will be fulfilled in accordance with the highest good for myself and everyone concerned." Then fold up your list and put it away where you will not be tempted to read it. I bury my list in my bowl of power stones, but another good idea is to put the list with your holiday decorations so it will be stored through the year and you will not have access to it again until the holiday season near the end of 2008. The idea is to put the list away and forget about it: not to forget about your dreams, but to put the list out of sight and out of mind.

If you have never tried manifesting your dreams, you might be skeptical. That's okay; I was skeptical my first time too! But I wrote down my goals for the following three years and long term goals I intended to achieve within ten years. You may want to do this as well (just make the necessary adjustments to the statements you write at the top and bottom of the list.) When I did go over my list a year later, I was very surprised. I had not only manifested 80% of the dreams for the first year, but in my first year I had also manifested several items listed for two and three years ahead! The dreams I was not able to manifest in my first year were dreams that did not serve the highest good of two very special people in my life, so I had no problems accepting that these dreams did not come to pass. I know they will manifest when the time is right, so I do not need to give up on those dreams--I just need to be patient.

Go ahead and make your list today, before you get too busy with the holiday season, and get ready to enjoy the best year of your life so far and the start of even better things to come!

~*~Monica Who~*~

That Hurts, Stop It!

As a young child, you may have learned that touching a hot stove causes pain and therefore you should not touch a hot stove. Physical pain teaches us a very simple and logical lesson: stop that and don't do that again. So why then do so many of us refuse to learn the exact same message from our emotional pain?

The truth is that most people fail to realize that our pain is a result of something we are doing and instead, we seek to blame the pain on an external source. We blame other people, circumstances, and even God for our pain. This leads us to develop the false belief that something else is responsible for our pain and therefore we cannot heal or prevent further pain ourselves. In some cases people do blame themselves and then begin to punish themselves, which leads to even more pain! Stop looking for someone or something to blame.

I'm not saying that the actions of other people cannot hurt you--but I seek to remind you that you have the power to learn from your pain and to stop doing whatever you were doing that resulted in the emotional injury, just as you would learn to not touch a hot stove after being burned. If you don't start learning from your emotional pain so you can heal and grow, you will start learning how to numb your pain through addictions to drugs, alcohol, sex, food, or other activities. Perhaps you have already started using addiction to avoid learning from your pain, and addictions (regardless of the form they take) always lead to more emotional turmoil and troubles in your life.

The next time you find yourself broken-hearted, crying your eyes out, blaming someone for your pain, shaking your fists at God, or turning toward addictions, stop and take a long look at what has happened to make you feel such pain. Rather than placing blame on any outside influence or punishing yourself, ask yourself what you could do differently to stop this pain and avoid it in the future. The answer may be tough to face, and the solution may involve taking an action (such as getting out of a toxic relationship) that you hoped you wouldn't have to do.

Turning away from, numbing or ignoring your pain will not help you; it is a deliberate choice to ignore the opportunity for growth and healing. Truly facing and learning from your pain takes courage and strength and you may be afraid to do it on your own, but you don't have to do it alone! True wisdom includes asking for help when you need it: ask your angels for help, seek the guidance and support of a therapist or counselor, or participate in a twelve step support group.

If you burn yourself on a hot stove, you learn to not touch a hot stove again and you tend to your injury to promote healing. When you learn from your emotional pain, also stop and take care of yourself as well. You may get hurt in different ways in the future, but you will truly benefit from taking the time to really learn the lesson your pain is trying to teach you.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Introduction to Meditation

Meditation is a practice that brings inner peace and harmony, spiritual enlightenment, healing, balance and overall wellness for your mind, body and spirit. Meditation is a vital aspect of spiritual growth and it can also be used for getting in touch with your innermost feelings and developing greater awareness of your body. Regular meditation will help you cope with stress and toxic emotions, feel stronger and healthier, and can even help you overcome problems such as insomnia, depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive tendencies, post traumatic stress, eating disorders, addictions, phobias, high blood pressure, chronic pain, and much more! Meditation is also the best way to initiate contact with angels.

I cannot tell you how many times people have asked me how to meditate! First, I want to tell you that meditation is not difficult; with just a little practice, you will be on your way to achieving all the benefits of meditation.

Relaxation is a key element to any meditation. You may want to meditate lying down with your eyes closed, but you might find yourself drifting off to sleep. If you want to meditate in a sitting position, make sure to employ good posture, with your back straight so you can breathe evenly from your diaphragm. Breathe deeply and evenly, and release all tension from your body.

There are countless ways to meditate, but there are two general methods of meditation. The first method is to focus your thoughts on a concept, idea or image and the second method is clear your mind of all thoughts, enabling messages from your angels, spirit guides and higher self to flow into your mind unencumbered by your mental clutter. You will find the first method much easier at first but both methods require a great deal of concentration, which is not a natural state for the human mind! For whichever method of meditation you choose, you must first train your mind to concentrate.

In the beginning it's best that you do not try to force concentration, rather begin by allowing your mind to wander freely. This can be both entertaining and enlightening as you learn more about your innermost thoughts. Once you have allowed your mind to wander freely, you will find it easier to focus your thoughts. I recommend that you give yourself fifteen to twenty minutes of roaming thought before you settle down and attempt to focus (use a timer). As you develop your skill, gradually reduce the time for rambling thought until you no longer need to give this freedom to your mind.

Concentration and focus can be achieved through several means. Here are a few that I find useful:

1. Focus on the sensations of your body. Control your breathing, listen to your heart beat, become fully aware of the air surrounding you and the feeling of the surface you're sitting or resting on.
2. Think of and make yourself fully aware of just one part of your body, such as your hand, and exclude all other sensations in the rest of your body.
3. Repeat a mantra over and over, either out loud or within your mind. Phrases from the Bible are useful mantras when you want to connect with angels and feel closer to God. A good example is, "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want," but of course there are many others that would work. Choose any phrase that inspires inner peace for you.
4. Visualize a simple object, shape or colour and think of nothing else until your mind is fully focused and undisturbed by any other thoughts or images.
5. Focus on one single emotion (love is best when you seek to connect with angels) until you fully grasp the meaning and experience of it.
6. Focus on a physical object such as a burning candle or power stone.
7. Focus on a mandala (an image portraying religious or mystical concepts; generally an image within a circle inside a square, with intricate or kaleidoscopic patterns.)

Training your mind to focus and concentrate may not be as easy as it sounds, but with continued practice you will achieve success. Include meditation in your daily routine to reap the full benefits for your mind, body and spirit, and in time you'll find that you can meditate in any position, anytime and anywhere!

~*~Monica Who~*~

P.S. Stay tuned--in a few days I will post about a simple yet beneficial meditation practice that even the busiest person can incorporate into their daily routine. I understand some people feel they cannot make time for extensive meditation every day.

Don't Fall in Love With Someones "Potential"

This is one of the most common mistakes people make in romantic relationships. You can clearly see how wonderful the other person could be, and you stay in the relationship because you're holding out hope that your partner will achieve the greatness you see in them. Believe me, I know all about this relationship mistake! I'm particularly prone to making this mistake because I see the divine in all people, and I have had to make a determined effort to avoid repeating the mistake of loving someone for who he could be.

You need to know that everyone has the potential for greatness, but some people have not realized their own potential yet and others have deliberately resisted being all they can be. It is good to recognize the divine in all people and to acknowledge another person's potential, but it's not something you can build a romantic partnership upon. If the other person isn't living up to their true potential, there is very little chance that you can change them.

Yes, we can inspire growth and positive changes in others but the process is more effective in other types of relationships, such as friendships or mentoring relationships. Healthy romantic relationships are built upon equality (among other things) which cannot be achieved if you're on different levels of growth and perspective.

If your partner isn't treating you the way you want and deserve to be treated, and they aren't giving you tangible here-and-now reasons to love them, then it really makes no difference what their potential is. You aren't likely to help them achieve their potential, and if you actually manage this there is a high likelihood that your partner will leave you and go on to be a great husband or wife to someone else! It happens more often than you might think, and it's because of the inequality taking place in the relationship. Sometimes people do fall in love with their teachers and mentors, but that is the exception rather than the norm.

Do you want to build your relationship on hopes for two very rare exceptions? It's rare to be able to inspire change and positive growth in your romantic partner, and it's just as rare that they'll stay with you if you do help them to grow and change.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Spiritual Protection: The Armor of God

Many people have expressed to me that they're very interested in developing their connection and communication with angels, but they also have fears about opening contact with the spirit realm. It's normal, healthy and wise to be concerned about encountering evil spirits--they do exist and do try to trick people. In 2 Corinthians 11:14, Paul writes, "Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light." It's important to take contact with the spirit realm very seriously--this is not a parlor trick or something to do for amusement. With that said, I would like to teach you the most powerful and effective spiritual protection prayer and visualization I know: The Armor of God.

The best way to protect yourself is described in Ephesians 6:11-18, where Paul writes about the Armor of God.

• The Belt of Truth: Satan is a great deceiver and that will be his first line of offense. He will try to trick you and will lie to you about yourself, your life, the people you care about, and worst of all he will try to lie to you about God and try to make you lose your faith.
• The Breastplate of Righteousness: Sin leaves us open to attacks from evil forces. While we are by nature sinful, we must always strive to avoid sin and live a holy life. Confess your sins to God daily to receive His forgiveness, and keep your thoughts focused on Him. Avoid temptation and be strong to the lures of the enemy.
• The Boots of Gospel Peace: Keep your feet firmly planted in the truth and you will feel at peace with God, and you can stand strong against Satan's attacks. Walk with the truth and you will not lose your way.
• The Shield of Faith: Trust and believe what God's Word says, and your faith will repel evil and temptation. Keep the faith in all areas of your life.
• The Helmet of Salvation: Remember that God's people will inherit the kingdom of heaven. Think of how glorious that will be! Keep your perspective on that future and the everlasting life that is to come. You are a beloved child of God, don't ever forget it!
• The Sword of the Spirit: The Word of God is your weapon against all evil. Study the scriptures and pray for discernment and understanding. Memorize scriptures as you study, and you can confidently use the Word of God to rebuke evil and defend yourself.

Visualize yourself putting on these articles of holy armor, and say to yourself as you put on the belt, "I am putting on the belt of truth. I know the truth about my God. He is a loving God. Suffering is the result of sin; my God does not cause sorrow or doubt. I know the truth about my God and evil cannot deceive me." See yourself putting on the breastplate and say, "I have confessed my sins to God and He has forgiven me. I strive to live a holy life each day. I will constantly endeavor to do better and I pray for strength to resist sin in my life. My righteousness will protect me from temptation." Next, mentally put on the boots and say, "I walk in peace with God and keep the gospel message in my heart. I will not lose my way and I will stand strong against evil." As you pick up the shield, say, "I have unfailing faith in God. He hears my prayers and answers them in the best way for me. I know God will always love me and protect me. I have faith in all His works." Put the helmet on your head and declare, "I am a beloved child of God! I will live eternally with Him in heaven. This life is short, and I will not allow it to bring me down into doubt and despair." Finally you pick up the sword and say, "I have the Word of God in my mind and heart. I know and remember what God says about evil and about the ways He protects His people. Like Jesus, I will defeat Satan with the Word of God, and I will be safe from all evil."

To put on the full Armor of God, you must be well acquainted with the Bible and have very strong faith. It will provide you with the ultimate protection, surround you with the love of God and fill you with the strength of God. There is no greater spiritual defense than this.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Understanding Your Nightmares

Nightmares are dreams that stir up intense negative emotions, which can make them more difficult to interpret. You have nightmares when something in your life demands your immediate attention and requires resolution. They can be a result of stress, fears and insecurities (both conscious and unconscious), general unhappiness and emotional turmoil, or traumatic events in your life. People suffering from Post Traumatic Stress often relive the traumatic event(s) in their dreams and can be plagued with persistent nightmares. Whatever the cause of the nightmare, the simple message is that you need to deal with something now before it becomes a much bigger problem.

In order to understand the real message of your nightmare, you need to separate yourself from the emotional reaction and consider all the symbols and concepts in your dream from an objective standpoint. (Most of the time you need to consider your emotional reactions when interpreting your dreams, but with nightmares the emotional reaction can overshadow the true meaning of the dream.) First consider the overall theme of your nightmare, some common examples are: betrayal, abandonment, loss, violence, and chaos. Also carefully consider all the situations in your present life that could be a source of stress, fear, insecurity or turmoil--is it possible that your nightmare represents any of these real situations? Nightmares that seem to be a realistic portrayal of your worst fears don't necessarily mean that your fears are going to come to pass in your near future! It means you're feeling particularly vulnerable and your fear or sense of insecurity requires your attention now before it gets out of hand and causes real problems in your waking life.

You might be confused about the meaning of your nightmare because of the people present in your dream. Sometimes a nightmare involves specific people in your life but the message may not relate to them or your relationship with them at all. For example, a nightmare about your mother dying could be connected to a fear of losing someone you care deeply about rather than your mother specifically.

Sometimes nightmares convey messages about things you are passionately concerned about, even if the events of the dream do not directly relate to your everyday life. People who have very passionate opinions about current events, war, human rights, animal rights, etc can experience nightmares about these topics. These types of nightmares are often messages that you should express your opinions more or even get involved in activism. These nightmares are usually quite specific in that they contain details that are relevant to the issue you're concerned about--a nightmare about the war in Iraq can mean you're being encouraged to express your political opinions more, while a dream about war in general often relates to fears of chaos, loss of control, etc.

I hope you will be able to decipher the important lessons of your nightmares so you can get on with dreaming much sweeter dreams!

~*~Monica Who~*~

"I Don't Repeat Gossip, So Listen Closely..."

These words are printed on a decorative plaque which hangs in my mother's kitchen. I can only assume that someone thought the words were cute and funny, but gossip is neither cute nor funny. Gossip lowers the spiritual vibration of everyone who participates in it. When people engage in gossip, their thoughts turn to judgement and they experience any number of toxic emotions such as jealousy, resentment, irritation, anger, depression and suspicion.

Never forget that words have equal power to hurt and to heal. Whenever possible, choose words that uplift, encourage, inspire and heal others. Speak kindly of others. Do not delight in the misfortune of others. When you encounter gossip, try to gently change the topic of discussion as quickly as possible. I like to say something like, "May the angels speak kindly of her in heaven."

Gossip isn't always full of negative judgements of others or details of their bad news. Sometimes people pass on another person's good news, thinking there is no harm in this type of gossip because it's positive--but even positive gossip can hurt. For example, news of a friend getting married or expecting a new baby can hurt someone who is struggling in their love life or longing for a child of their own. In addition, the person you're talking about might not wish to share their good news with many others.

Sometimes you might discuss another person or the events of someone else's life because you are struggling with that person or are otherwise troubled by the information, and you require support or advice. In these situations, respect the other person as much as possible. Carefully consider your choice of confidant--do not discuss these matters with someone who cannot advise you appropriately or who is likely to repeat what you have said in confidence. Don't reveal unnecessary details, choose your words very carefully, and avoid judging the other person. Their actions could be hurtful or troubling to you, but they could be reacting to pain and suffering that you are unaware of.

Before you speak about another person, ask yourself why you feel compelled to say something. Check your intentions and make sure that you have every one's highest good in mind.

May the angels speak kindly of us all in heaven!

~*~Monica Who~*~

Drifting Apart and Reconnecting

Sometimes friends drift apart, without even meaning to. Maybe you both got caught up in your busy lives, or maybe one or both of you withdrew and started isolating. You find yourself looking back and wondering what happened. You wonder how your friend is doing because you never stopped caring, you just lost touch.

Last summer I lost touch with a friend. We had become instant friends and bonded over many shared experiences. She means a great deal to me, but we drifted apart. The other night I logged onto MySpace (I hadn't been on that site in a long time) and saw she was online, so I sent her a brief note to let her know I was thinking of her. She responded with a long email and told me she was happy to hear from me. I'm happy too!

If you've lost touch with someone special and you keep wondering about them, I urge you to reach out today. Don't waste another day! Just because you haven't heard from someone in a while doesn't mean they aren't thinking about you. Send a little note or pick up the phone and call your friend. You've already lost touch. You have nothing to lose by reaching out, and there is so much you could gain!

Do not save your loving speeches
For your friends till they are dead;
Do not write them on their tombstones,
Speak them rather now instead.
-- Anna Cummins

~*~Monica Who~*~

Giving Second Chances

Giving someone a second chance can be a difficult decision, especially when you have been hurt by them. Forgiveness is always good for your soul, but forgiving someone doesn't necessarily mean giving them another chance to hurt you. There is a very real possibility that they'll repeat the behaviour that made you pull away in the first place. Other times second chances lead to healing, growth and fulfilling experiences. When is it a good idea to give a second chance?

This is definitely a decision you have to make for yourself. It can be helpful to seek the advice and opinions of people you trust, but ultimately you are the one who will live with the decision. There are times when friends and loved ones will discourage giving a second chance because they love you and don't want to see you get hurt, but only you can decide if it's really a good idea or not.

The first thing you should consider when making this decision is: what has changed? If you pulled away from a friend, family member or romantic partner because the relationship was toxic, you should not give a second chance if nothing has changed. Does the other person demonstrate a genuine willingness to change? Has the other person expressed a new point of view and accepted responsibility for their actions?

Do you want to give this person a second chance? It could be a mistake. You could get hurt again. You already know this, but if your heart is telling you to give another chance it's probably a risk you're willing to take (even if nothing has changed). Sometimes the risk pays off with rewarding new experiences with someone you already care deeply for, and sometimes the pay off comes in the form of a painful but valuable lesson learned.

No one can make the decision for you and no one has the right to judge you for the decision you make, regardless of the outcome.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Are You a SLIder?

SLI is an acronym for Street Lamp Interference, a psychic phenomenon involving electromagnetic interference (usually unintentional). Some people experience street lights going out as they approach them--far more often than can be explained by typical malfunctions. SLIder is the name given to people who seem to cause electromagnetic interference.

I don't know why it has been called SLI because there are many other ways this electromagnetic phenomenon is experienced. SLIders often have trouble keeping a wrist watch functional, their credit cards and bank cards often fail because the information on the magnetic strip gets corrupted or erased (this is especially problematic for male SLIders who typically keep their wallet in their back pocket), and they can cause all sorts of malfunctions in electronic equipment.

SLI seems to be quite common amongst psychics but it can be an issue for anyone who has a strong aura. It's a fascinating phenomenon that is being studied, but for SLIders, it can be very annoying and difficult to live with. It can also be embarrassing. There was a time in my life when it got a little out of hand and a gentleman asked if he could walk me home. I tried to convince him that I was capable of getting myself home, but I finally gave in to his request. We walked in silence for about 15 minutes before he blurted out, "I hope this thing with the lights is the only reason you didn't want me to walk with you." I swear to you, every single light went out as we approached it and didn't come back on until we were about 50 ft away, and it was impossible for him to not notice it! Thankfully his humour about it helped me feel a lot better.

Most SLIders experience electronic malfunctions when they are in an emotionally agitated state, such as when they are very stressed or feeling intense emotions. Over the years, I've made meditation a regular part of my routine and it seems to have nearly eliminated the experience. Relaxation, stress relief and meditation can help you minimize the electromagnetic interference you might be experiencing.

For most people, SLI is completely unintentional, but some people have learned to control and even benefit from their strange ability. My father used to run an electronics repair shop and he revealed to me that he often "fixed" broken equipment by putting his head down on it and taking a little nap! He also had plenty of experiences with equipment that wasn't broken at all but was simply being effected by the energy of the owner.

If it has never happened to you, this probably sounds like bad science fiction! If you are a SLIder, I would love to hear some of your experiences. Have you been able to control it, or minimize it, with meditation? Have your experiences been connected with intense emotional experiences? Have you found any beneficial ways to use your unusual talent?

~*~Monica Who~*~

Dream Themes & Symbols: Travel

Travel is another very common theme in dreams that most often refers to your personal journey. Travel in a dream tends to convey messages regarding your personal progress in emotional and spiritual development, or your goals. The mode of transportation, as well as events surrounding travel and your emotional reactions reveals greater insight into the message your angels are trying to express through your dreams. (Of course, the meaning of your travel dream can be slightly different if you are actually planning a trip. The events and emotions you experience in the dream can be messages about your expectations of your upcoming travel, and the ideas expressed in this article can help you decipher the dream as long as you take into account the events of your waking life that are relevant.)

If you dream of traveling on an airplane, the message is typically that you are soaring and achieving success, spiritual enlightenment, or positive and optimistic emotions. Because you are traveling through the air, this type of travel dream can also convey messages about your intellect, higher reasoning or higher self. The airplane itself often refers to the assistance of your angels because you are not flying all on your own power. However, if you have a fearful reaction to flying in the airplane (with or without a fear of flying in your waking life) this can reveal a fear of success, fear of unconventional thoughts or ideas, or even feeling like you don't deserve the help of angels in your journey. The fear can also be a result of events taking place within the dream, such as strong turbulence, which could indicate troubles or difficult patches along your journey. Again, paying close attention to the events happening in your dream will help you to interpret the full message.

As I mentioned in a previous blog entry, travel by train often conveys a message of a relatively smooth journey. It can also mean conforming to a standard method of doing things, doing things in a sequential order that is preplanned and organized, a journey that is comfortable and predictable, or even "being on the right track."

Travel by car tends to express independence and free thinking in your journey, even if you are not traveling alone. It can convey messages of spontaneity, freedom, doing things your own way, or even a desire for control of your journey.

Dreaming of traveling by boat can be a complex message because of the element of water, which almost always represents emotions. It can mean your journey heavily relies on your emotions and emotional stability, or is motivated by emotions (either realized or repressed). The conditions of the weather and the water are usually of particular significance in these dreams and tend to relate to emotional experiences.

There are certainly other forms of transportation that can be present in your travel dreams, but these are the most common and will give you a good starting point for understanding what other modes of transportation could mean in your dream. The next thing to consider about the dream is the events surrounding the travel. Was it a surprise trip? Was it a trip for personal reasons or perhaps a business trip? Was it a long or short journey? Were there any delays or unexpected events along the way, and if so, how did you feel or react to them? Were you traveling alone, who were you traveling with, or who did you interact with along the way? What were your thoughts and emotional reactions to other people in your dream? Was the outcome of your travel unexpected and was the experience satisfying? Was your final destination known in advance or come as a surprise? Did you reach your final destination and if so, what were your thoughts and emotional reactions to the destination?

~*~Monica Who~*~

Mind-Body-Spirit Wellness: Small Changes Can Make a Big Difference

A balanced approach toward personal wellness involves taking steps to improve the health of your mind, body and spirit. We're all aware of the ways mental and emotional stress can negatively impact your physical health, and likewise, how struggling with illness can make you unhappy.

Taking care of your body is something you probably know the most about because physical health information is presented to us on a regular basis. You know that eating a balanced diet and living an active lifestyle are two things that can really improve your physical health. What you might not realize is that while you're exercising, you have an excellent opportunity to improve your mental or spiritual health at the same time by meditating. There are many forms of meditation and you don't have to be completely relaxed and perfectly still to meditate. While you're exercising, you can explore philosophical questions, contemplate the events of your life, engage in conversation with your angels, explore new ideas, and work through your emotions.

Many people find religious study and activities to be a vital part of their spiritual wellness, but religion isn't the only way to improve the health of your spirit. Appreciating nature and the divine connection between all living things is one very good way. Find ways that you're comfortable with and keep an open mind about new ways and new spiritual ideas that are presented to you. Studying other spiritual beliefs is a good way to enhance the health of your spirit and your mind at the same time--don't worry that you're somehow betraying your beliefs by learning more about what other people believe.

Taking care of your mental health means improving your psychology as well as your mental focus and intellect. Try to reduce and relieve stress, sort through and express your emotions (at least through journaling), and also devote some time to learning and exercising your memory.

Making time for improving the health of your mind, body and spirit can be a lot easier than you might think, and even small changes can make a big difference in your overall wellness. Set aside some time each day for taking care of your mind, body and spirit--and combine these activities when you can. Also, try new things and change your routine from time to time to prevent boredom and becoming stagnant.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Get More from Life

The popular saying, "You get out of life what you put into it" rings true with most of us, but there are times when it makes you feel even more frustrated! You've been putting in so much hard work and feel like you're getting nowhere fast, and this saying seems to imply that you're just not trying hard enough.

If you're not getting what you want in life, it's time to re-evaluate things. It is true that your actions, intentions, and attitude have a major impact on the events and overall success of your life. Changing any of these elements can dramatically change your results. There might not be anything lacking in your actions! Sometimes taking on a more positive attitude is the only change you need to make in order to start experiencing positive results from your actions. The Law of Attraction applies in these situations--approaching things with a positive attitude helps attract positive energy, plus it minimizes frustration, impatience, and other negative emotional reactions to your situation.

You can also adjust your intentions to receive more desirable results. In work you may be putting in a great deal of effort, intending to achieve financial gain. That's a natural desire but you could be focusing too much on financial struggles; focusing on what you lack can prevent you from attracting what you want. Think about the success you want to achieve and ask yourself what else you'll get out of that type of success. Perhaps you can motivate yourself in a new way to experience new results.

Adjusting your attitude and intent will go a long way in helping you get more out of life, but sometimes you do need to re-think your strategy and actions as well. Explore new ideas and try new things. If you're having any trouble finding new ideas, ask your angels to help you and be open to the inspiration that will soon come your way!

~*~Monica Who~*~

Yes You CAN Talk to Your Angels!

When I advise someone to talk to their angels, they sometimes reply, "But I can't talk to my angels like you can." Yes, you can! You might not hear their replies in the ways I do, but there is absolutely nothing blocking your ability to talk to them or their ability to hear you. In time you will develop greater ability to receive and recognize the messages your angels are communicating to you.

The first step is to start talking to them. Some people are most comfortable writing letters or journal entries to their angels. You can use your voice to communicate with them, although you might feel silly doing that and it isn't always appropriate (such as when you're around other people). Instead, you can address the angels in your thoughts. Talk to them about anything and everything. They're with you to help you, they deeply care about you, and they are your friends--so talk to them that way!

You may expect to hear their responses as voices, but you might not be ready to develop clairaudient abilities just yet and not all angels communicate that way. Let go of any preconceptions and expectations regarding how your angels will communicate with you, and be open to receiving their messages in many different ways. Voices and whispers certainly are one way your angels can communicate with you, but here are some other ways:

• Intuition: It can be difficult to recognize intuition because it comes to you in your own thoughts rather than a different voice or something else immediately recognized as coming from an outside source. Angels often provide you with new thoughts and ideas, and instinctive knowledge.
• Dreams and visions: When you're asleep you are more open to spiritual communication. Visions are less common but are mentioned in connection with dreams because visions often involve similar imagery as our dreams and learning to interpret your dreams can help you to understand the symbolic visions you might receive.
• Music: If you have a song stuck in your head even though you haven't heard it recently, the lyrics could have a significant message the angels want you to hear. Likewise, you might turn on the radio just because and hear a song that is relevant to your current situation. (In both cases you're also receiving and responding to intuition.) If you associate the song with a time in your life or another person, that could be the subject of the message the angels are trying to communicate.
• Sounds: Angels can communicate through other sounds as well, such as bells, chimes, footfalls, and knocking. This is a clairaudient experience that can be much easier for you to pick up than actual voices, and these sounds all indicate that your angels are trying to get your attention.
• Emotions: When the message relates to emotions, your angels can communicate through your emotions. Pay particular attention to changes in your emotions that don't seem connected to the events around you.
• Scents: Our sense of scent is strongly linked to our memory, and sometimes you may pick up a smell that has no physical source in your environment. Usually it will be a familiar scent that reminds you of a specific time in your life or even someone you know. This is a clairsentient experience and your angels may be trying to communicate a message about your memories or the person the scent is associated with.
• Physical sensations: A feeling of exhilarating (not uncomfortable) chills or tingles is a fairly typical clairsentient message from the angels, usually intended to confirm something that was just thought or spoken. Sometimes you will feel a comforting sensation as if someone has placed their hand on your shoulder or even hugged you, and it's a way the angels may comfort or encourage you.

There are many ways your angels can communicate with you, and you may have stronger abilities to pick up messages in some of these ways than in others. If you start to recognize the messages angels are communicating with you in one of these ways, they will probably begin to communicate with you in other ways too. Be open to receiving messages from them in these ways, as well as others.

P.S. I wanted to share a personal example of how the angels use music to communicate with me. During my first week in Helsinki, I went out for a walk at 4:30 am. I consulted the map before I left, but around 5:00 am I realized I was quite lost! There was no one around to ask for help, so I asked the angels to show me the way. Just as I found the right street to get back home, a Finnish song called "Varjot" by my favourite band, Turmion Kätilöt, started playing on my mp3 player. I still don't know what the words mean, so when that song gets stuck in my head I know the message isn't related to the lyrics. The message is always either that I'm on the right path now or the angels want to show me the right way. Needless to say, I really like it when "Varjot" gets stuck in my head!

I would love to hear some of your stories about how the angels have communicated with you.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Seeking Closure

What is closure and how can you get it? Closure is another word for healing that is achieved through clarity and understanding. How you get closure depends on the situation that requires healing, but today I want to focus on getting closure after a romantic break up.

The clarity and understanding many people feel they need after a break up is centered around what went wrong. Sometimes the break up was unexpected and came as a total shock, and other times you are perfectly aware of how the relationship failed, but you seek to understand why. So often people want to get that clarity and understanding from the other person and it just isn't possible. Sometimes the other person wants no further contact and will shut down any attempts at communication, and other times he or she lacks the insight you seek and has no chance of providing it for you.

When the other person cannot give you closure, there are other options for achieving clarity and understanding. Talking to other people can really help; ask your friends or even join online discussion forums (just remember to respect the other person's right to privacy).

I feel that self exploration is the most effective way to get closure, especially when you want to figure out what lesson you were meant to gain by the experience. First you need to know what type of closure you really need. Do you need to understand how the relationship failed, why it failed, or what lesson you're meant to learn? The next step is to brain storm about all the possible answers to your question (journaling is a good way to do this) and carefully consider all the ideas that resonate with you.

Sometimes the relationship feels generally unfinished and unsettling because you feel the other person did not understand or appreciate your perspective and emotions. You might feel a profound need to express yourself to that person, but often you wont have the opportunity, or that type of communication would deteriorate into an argument or otherwise become unproductive and dissatisfying. In that type of situation, you will benefit most from writing your feelings in a letter and then releasing them by destroying the letter.

The final step in your quest for closure will be to decide where to go now and what to do with what you have learned. Is there a way for you to share your lessons with others? What will you do differently in your future relationships?

~*~Monica Who~*~

What is Clairsentience?

Clairsentience means "clear sensing" and is a psychic ability that takes on several forms. The best known form of clairsentience is also known as "psychometry" and is the ability to receive psychic insight by holding an object, or sensing the energy in a particular location. For example, a psychic may do readings by holding a personal object such as a watch or ring belonging to their client. The psychic senses the spiritual energy (also called prana or chi) contained within the object and can provide startling insight about their client and events surrounding the client (past, present and future).

Clairsentience does take on other forms as well. Sometimes a reader receives information from sense stimuli such as a feeling of "chills" or "tingles." They may feel a change in temperature (warmer or cooler). At other times a person who is clairsentient may pick up a strong scent (such as smelling another person's perfume or cologne). Interpreting these clairsentient messages can be extremely difficult and usually requires additional psychic abilities working in conjunction with clairsentience--or the reader has to interpret the clairsentient stimulus based on past experience alone. For example, many readers experience a tingling sensation as an instant confirmation of something that was just said or thought. A personal example for me is that whenever I pick up a strong scent of one of my friends' perfume or cologne, I receive a visit or important communication from that friend within a few hours.

You don't have to be aware of or in control of your psychic abilities to receive information through clairsentience. If you receive information this way, your interpretation would have to be based on your own past experiences--or better yet, with additional information provided through your other psychic abilities such as intuition, clairvoyance, clairaudience, etc. Pay close attention to your thoughts, emotions, intuitive impressions and any new ideas experienced at the time of your clairsentient experience.

~*~Monica Who~*~

Love at First Sight & Manifesting your True Desires

I was speaking with one of my idols at the moment when I first saw him. I was so happy and excited to meet this person I idolize so much--it was really a big moment for me--but when I saw him and our eyes met for the first time, the world stood still. I'm not kidding! In that moment I felt so many things I had never felt before; my heart flooded with wonderful emotions, and I felt weak in the knees and literally stunned. I probably looked as if I'd just been slapped, and I completely lost track of my conversation with my idol for a few moments; I just couldn't pay attention to what he was saying because this other incredible man had just enchanted me with his eyes and his presence!

Was it love at first sight? Certainly. Is it true love? I haven't found out yet. I don't know him well enough to know if he's the right one for me, or if we can enhance each other's lives and enjoy a lasting bond for years to come. Sure, I have the added benefit of being psychic and being able to see many of his characteristics and qualities long before they can be revealed to me through our interactions, but I'm still not sure if the love that overcame me in that first moment is true love or not. The feelings were certainly very real and genuine, and I fully intend to never forget that awesome experience!

What we focus on is what we attract (or manifest) into our lives. I try not to focus on my longing to be with him, because in essence that's focusing on the fact that we aren't together and such focus could actually prevent my desires from being fulfilled. Instead of focusing on him directly, I focus on the things I felt when our eyes first met. I allow myself to recall that brief moment in full emotional detail; I cherish those feelings with complete gratitude. This allows me to attract romance and enchantment into my life with acceptance that I could experience love with him or possibly with someone else who can inspire those emotions in me.

If you have had a similar experience and a longing to be with the one who made your heart soar to brand new heights, start focusing on the wonderful feelings rather than the person you desire. Your true desire is to experience those feelings in a lasting and fulfilling relationship. It's possible that the one who inspired those feelings is not able to help you feel that way consistently or for an extended period of your life, or possibly he or she is not ready for that type of relationship yet. It's also possible that the one who inspired those feelings will be the one who can enjoy that type of relationship with you, but shifting your focus to the pure essence of love will help you manifest what you truly want.

If you are already involved in a relationship with the one you love, you can enhance your relationship by regularly taking time to focus on all of those enchanting moments that made you fall in love in the first place. Allow yourself to recall every detail and hold onto every amazing emotion you felt in those moments. It will help you manifest even greater love between the two of you and enable you to experience true enchantment over and over!

~*~Monica Who~*~